Shane Gillis, Mark Normand, Ari Shaffir & friends (Protect Our Parks 16 panel): A rotating crew of stand-up comedians who appear together on Rogan's recurring 'Protect Our Parks' panel episodes. This installment features Shane Gillis, Mark Normand, Ari Shaffir and other comics riffing freely with no real agenda.
What this episode covers
There is no single topic; the panel free-associates across the day's news and their own world. They open on a JP Morgan harassment lawsuit they decide was fabricated, the recurring assassination attempts on Trump, MK Ultra, the Epstein death, ICE and immigration enforcement, and US healthcare costs. They pivot into drug stories (acid at concerts, edible mishaps, Trump legalizing psychedelics, ibogaine for veterans), Jackass and streamer fight clips, and a long stretch on the state of stand-up comedy (arena comics, cancel culture, the 'velvet prison' of TV). It closes with Rogan trying to talk a reluctant comic into buying a muscle car and watches of school-shooting heroics and Scientology 'speed runs.' Throughout, Free Bird and Metallica's Moscow concert are running gags.
Recommended on this episode
Hulk Hogan documentary
Netflix
“Have you guys watched the Hogan doc? It's good. It's [ __ ] good. Really? When he's getting sued”— Ari Shaffir
Revology Mustang (1969 Boss 429)
Revology Cars (Tom Scarpello)
“There's a company this company Revology. They make a brand new 1969 Mustang... It's a full factory, but it's completely reliable.”— Joe Rogan
The guest's own work
Ari Shaffir: The End
Ari Shaffir
“So mostly guys from my storytelling show. Which is also online behind a paywall. The end.”— Ari Shaffir
Ari Shaffir: The End
Ari Shaffir
“The end is available right now at Ari's Take 5.”— Ari Shaffir
Inappropriate Comedy
Vince Offer (ShamWow guy)
“I co-starred in a movie with She's back. Lohan. Yeah, worst movie of all time. What was that? Inappropriate comedy.”— Joe Rogan
Also referenced (named, not recommended)
Disclosure
Barry Levinson
“What she was the boss and she made the guy [ __ ] her? Disclosure. Oh, I used to yank it to that one.”— Joe Rogan
Jojo Rabbit
Taika Waititi
“There we go. Jojo Rabbit. Music, please. Music, please.”— Joe Rogan
UFOs, JFK, and Elvis: Conspiracies You Don't Have to Be Crazy to Believe
Richard Belzer
“He wrote a book on Elvis, Bigfoot, and flying saucers... UFOs, JFKs, and Elvis: Conspiracies You Don't Have to Be Crazy to Believe.”— Joe Rogan
Dead Wrong: Straight Facts on the Country's Most Controversial Cover-Ups
Richard Belzer
“Dead Wrong: Straight Facts on the Country's Most Controversial Cover-Ups.”— Joe Rogan
Hit List: An In-Depth Investigation into the Mysterious Deaths of Witnesses to the JFK Assassination
Richard Belzer
“Hit List: An In-Depth Investigation into Mysterious Deaths of Witnesses to the JFK Assassination.”— Joe Rogan
Shelby Super Snake R
Shelby American
“how about a Shelby a Shelby Super Snake R... 850 [ __ ] horsepower.”— Joe Rogan
Cadillac CT5-V Blackwing
Cadillac
“How about a Cadillac Blackwing? How about a CT CT5V Blackwing? How about that?”— Joe Rogan
Omega Speedmaster
Omega
“Next, protect our parks. I'm going to get you a Speedmaster. Omega Speedmaster.”— Joe Rogan
ShamWow
Vince Offer
“I got a good ShamWow story... in the morning, I got a ShamWow. He soaked it all up. It soaks really well.”— Joe Rogan
Big reveals from this episode
- Rogan recounts texting Trump to legalize psychedelics and Trump replying 'let's do it,' leading to a White House event with veterans who used ibogaine.
- Describes being pulled into the gold-redecorated Oval Office and doing a live psychedelics pitch that Trump let him finish uninterrupted.
- Claims Tucker Carlson's encrypted Signal messages were decrypted for about $600,000 to expose his planned Putin interview.
- Lays out his read of a Border Patrol shooting hinging on the SIG P320's notorious accidental discharges.
- Says George Carlin had three heart attacks from cocaine and later battled a pill addiction late in life.
- Reveals his manager once staged an intervention thinking he had a gambling problem, when he was just eating steak and lobster every night.
- Tells how he saw Rodney Dangerfield perform naked under a bathrobe in 1986 while working as a teenage security guard.
- Recalls quitting his security-guard job mid-riot at a Neil Young concert, the same Neil Young who later pulled his music off Spotify over Rogan.
Worth remembering
- John Hinckley Jr., who shot Reagan, is now out and releasing music.
- MK Ultra ran CIA brothels ('Operation Midnight Climax') dosing patrons with LSD behind two-way mirrors.
- Brock Lesnar's wife is former WWE wrestler Sable, and his daughter is a champion shot putter.
- Discussion that expired medication can stay effective long past its date, casting doubt on why expirations exist.
- Per Perplexity, a US universal healthcare system would cost ~$3.0-3.2T/year versus the current ~$5.3T, roughly a 40-50% savings.
- Hulk Hogan's $400,000 lawsuit settlement bought a house in France he jokingly named 'Chez Hogan.'
- Andrew Dice Clay was the original stadium stand-up act, playing arenas decades before it became common.
- Former Texas governor Rick Perry reportedly saw brain atrophy reverse (25% in weeks, 100% in months) after ibogaine.
- The ShamWow is a synthetic chamois the inventor says he sourced as the best of seven samples from Korean factories.
- An Oklahoma school principal tackled an armed former student, took a bullet to the leg, and got a hero's welcome at prom.