The guest
Brian Simpson: Stand-up comedian and host of the 'BS with Brian Simpson' podcast; a former foster kid and military veteran who came up working the door at a comedy club.
What this episode covers
Joe Rogan welcomes comedian Brian Simpson for a sprawling, loosely-structured conversation that keeps circling back to the craft of stand-up: the years of bombing, following monsters like Joey Diaz and Martin Lawrence, the importance of reps, and how new comics use apps and meticulous note-taking to improve faster. They detour through combat sports, with Joe delivering long, detailed breakdowns of Jiu-Jitsu, boxing knockouts, and fighters like BJ Penn, GSP, Jon Jones, and Mark Hunt. Bigger themes run underneath: the toll of fame, foster-care childhood and ADHD meds, the COVID lockdowns and their psychological damage, and the morality of porn, prostitution, and OnlyFans. The pair also indulge in conspiracy lore from cobalt-mine slavery and CIA drug smuggling to ancient-alien Sumerian theories. It closes with a pep talk from Joe about discipline, fitness, and getting healthy.
Recommended on this episode
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The Last Stand
Damon Wayans
“go watch that special it's Sensational”
“he had this special called The Last Stand go watch that special it's Sensational and again you gotta watch it”— Joe Rogan
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Uptime Energy Drink
Uptime
“I drink it all the time good stuff”
“it's some kind of energy drink energy drink yeah I drink it all the time good stuff what's it called again up time”— Brian Simpson
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American Made
Doug Liman
“it's great movie... go see Tom Cruise and American made”
“they did a movie on him with Tom Cruise oh okay I think it's called American made is that what it's called it's great movie”— Joe Rogan
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Sanford and Son
“you know what holds up it's Sanford and Son... that makes me laugh”
“you know what holds up it's Sanford and Son oh yeah that makes me laugh oh my God still red fox”— Joe Rogan
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Evernote
“that's my main one... that's a really good one”
“do you use the the elephant one... that's my main one just because I know that it's cross-platform... that's a really good one”— Brian Simpson
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Stand Up (comedy app)
“if I could pay somebody to transfer all my stuff into it I would... it's made for stand up”
“the young Comics now they're using an app called stand upper... it's made for stand up... if I could pay somebody to transfer all my stuff into it I would”— Brian Simpson
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Road House
“Roadhouse is the greatest movie to watch high ever... it's amazing it's amazing”
“Roadhouse is the greatest movie to watch High Ever... it's amazing it's amazing it's so over the top”— Joe Rogan
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Southpaw
Antoine Fuqua
“it's a good movie... very gritty movie very realistic movie”
“He did that Southpaw movie... it's a good movie man it's a heavy movie... it's a very gritty movie very realistic movie”— Joe Rogan
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Polar chest strap (heart rate monitor)
Polar
“that's what I use”
“so we'll get you a polar chest strap that's what I use you could use anyone you want but the chest straps”— Joe Rogan
The guest's own work
MediaBy the guest
BS with Brian Simpson
Brian Simpson
“on my podcast BS with Brian Simpson check it out it's a very good YouTube all platforms BS for Brian Simpson”— Brian Simpson
Also referenced (named, not recommended)
ProductReferenced
Tom Ford glasses
Tom Ford
“he pulled out some Tom Ford glasses you know and it's like that it's like when you finally can start buying stuff like that”— Brian Simpson
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Gattaca
“they're gonna make Thors and hulks they're gonna like people are gonna be able to run 500 miles an hour remember remember Gattaca”— Joe Rogan
MediaReferenced
Family Matters
“the comedies usually like Family Matters Full House these shows every now and then they would do like a serious episode”— Brian Simpson
MediaReferenced
Full House
“the comedies usually like Family Matters Full House these shows every now and then they would do like a serious episode”— Brian Simpson
ProductReferenced
OnlyFans
OnlyFans
“how much money do you think was spent on only fans last year... 4.8 billion dollars in one year and remember Jamie”— Joe Rogan
ProductReferenced
Porsche 911T
Porsche
“the new 911t has more electronic equipment than the old one including electronically adjustable dampers active engine transmission”— Joe Rogan
ProductReferenced
iPhone
Apple
“you need an iPhone this is you know an iPhone I don't know if you could do that in these primitive Android devices”— Joe Rogan
ProductReferenced
Tesla Model 3
Tesla
“he used the money for college and to possibly buy a Tesla Model 3 and that was I guess their last public exchange”— Joe Rogan
ProductReferenced
Pegasus spyware
NSO Group
“they hacked his phone oh yeah yeah they used that Pegasus software on his phone he opened up a WhatsApp link”— Joe Rogan
MediaReferenced
Reagan
Killer Mike
“there's a Killer Mike song called Reagan or something like that and it starts off with his speech about”— Brian Simpson
BookReferenced
Outliers
Malcolm Gladwell
“if you read like Malcolm gladwell's the outliers one of the things that he'll talk about with certain incredible success stories”— Joe Rogan
MediaReferenced
Game of Thrones
HBO
“you ever you ever watched Game of Thrones yes yes okay you know the the Joffrey kid yes he just dipped out”— Brian Simpson
MediaReferenced
The Professional
Luc Besson
“what happened to the kid from from The Professional... she's like flirting with him through the whole movie right”— Joe Rogan
MediaReferenced
Taxi Driver
Martin Scorsese
“Jody Foster was in taxi driver think about that creepy movie... she was sexualized when she was very very young in that movie”— Joe Rogan
ProductReferenced
Ritalin
“Ritalin acts much like cocaine... methylphenidate which is Ritalin which is taken daily by 4 million to 6 million children”— Joe Rogan
ProductReferenced
Adderall
“how many of those people that aren't lying are on Adderall because it feels like more than four percent”— Joe Rogan
ProductReferenced
Prozac
“they try to put me on Prozac too when I was a teenager and I was like how you know this ain't they experimenting on me”— Brian Simpson
ProductReferenced
PlayStation
Sony
“how they feel about their husband's PlayStation they gonna all be like they hate that device because he chooses it over them”— Brian Simpson
MediaReferenced
Half Baked
“he went through a long period where he definitely didn't get high he was getting too high yeah decided to back off and he was in Half Baked”— Joe Rogan
ProductReferenced
Samsung Notes
Samsung
“I use three different apps for my job stuff... Samsung Notes and and then Google keep is another one I use”— Brian Simpson
ProductReferenced
Google Keep
“I use three different apps for my job stuff... Samsung Notes and and then Google keep is another one I use”— Brian Simpson
ProductReferenced
GoPro
GoPro
“it's like when you know those dudes are like walking on the top of skyscrapers like balancing with GoPros”— Joe Rogan
MediaReferenced
65
“have you seen that ad for that new movie with the Adam Driver... they go back 65 million years ago and with modern weapons”— Brian Simpson
MediaReferenced
Oppenheimer
Christopher Nolan
“the Oppenheimer trailer for oh yeah that looks great it was a movie looked really good that's Christopher Nolan”— Joe Rogan
MediaReferenced
Gravity
“you ever heard Neil deGrasse Tyson break down the movie gravity oh yeah he's like her hair would not be like this”— Joe Rogan
MediaReferenced
The Perfect Storm
“they gonna catch like a 150 foot wave... have you ever see that movie yeah it was like they go”— Brian Simpson
MediaReferenced
Point Break
Kathryn Bigelow
“they're very territorial... plot to Point Break you're explaining right now man this is a movie I haven't heard of in a long time”— Brian Simpson
MediaReferenced
Ghost
“remember ghost oh yeah he was in ghosts because I love Whoopi Goldberg you gotta watch this”— Joe Rogan
MediaReferenced
Dirty Dancing
“Patrick Swayze was like a dancer... the dancing was what I mean like for Dirty Dancing”— Joe Rogan
MediaReferenced
The Big Lebowski
Coen Brothers
“until it's time to not be nice so says the fighting philosopher oh that's new from Big Lebowski yes”— Brian Simpson
MediaReferenced
The Boxer
Jim Sheridan
“Daniel Day-Lewis did it in that movie The Boxer and he actually trained as a boxer for a year before he did that movie”— Joe Rogan
MediaReferenced
Bring the Pain
Chris Rock
“he's been murdering murdering like old school bring the pain Chris Rock yeah because I think he got freed”— Brian Simpson
MediaReferenced
I Am Legend
“you gonna like dismiss all the great movies that guy's made I Am Legend no I Robot all these”— Brian Simpson
MediaReferenced
I, Robot
“you gonna like dismiss all the great movies that guy's made I Am Legend no I Robot all these”— Brian Simpson
Big reveals from this episode
- Joe describes the Siddharth Kara cobalt-mining episode, saying child and slave labor in the Congo sits at the bottom of every cell phone's supply chain.
- Joe recounts being ringside in Brazil in 2003 when brown-belt Eddie Bravo tapped Royler Gracie with a triangle, the upset that birthed 10th Planet Jiu-Jitsu.
- Joe tells the Barry Seal / Mena Arkansas story: kids found murdered near a cocaine drop point, a CIA-linked smuggling operation, and Seal killed with a Bush phone number in his pocket.
- Brian reveals that as a foster kid he secretly spat out his Ritalin for weeks, then heard adults praise his 'progress' when he wasn't even taking it.
- Joe explains he stopped doing live comedy during the pandemic out of fear of infecting someone, returning only via tested 'bubble' outdoor shows with Chappelle.
- They watch a Shark Week clip of a great white smashing through a plexiglass box, and an expert admits no cage will actually stop a great white.
Worth remembering
- Android phones reportedly passed 50% of the US market for the first time, ending Apple's lock on America.
- An estimated 4.8 billion dollars was spent on OnlyFans in a single year.
- A communications expert's theory holds the Australian accent stems from the drunken slur of heavy-drinking early settlers.
- Zecharia Sitchin's reading of Sumerian texts described Nibiru, a planet on a 3,600-year orbit, and the Anunnaki who supposedly engineered human DNA.
- Imaging research found Ritalin (methylphenidate) acts much like cocaine when injected; it is taken daily by 4 to 6 million US children.
- Redd Foxx is credited as essentially inventing the comedy album, the first to put stand-up on a record.
- Mike Tyson studied his manager Jim Jacobs's vast library of old fight films, absorbing the styles of Dempsey, Sugar Ray Robinson, and others.
- Boxer Emile Griffith beat Benny Paret to death in the ring after Paret repeatedly taunted him about being gay.
- There is a gene, believed to be ApoE4, linked to a higher likelihood of developing CTE.
- The Great Pyramid contains roughly 2.3 million stones, some quarried hundreds of miles away and cut with razor-thin precision.
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