Mary Portas: British retail consultant, broadcaster and author known as 'Mary Queen of Shops', former Harvey Nichols creative director, and author of Rebuild and Work Like a Woman.
What this episode covers
Mary Portas joins Steven Bartlett to trace her life from a working-class Watford childhood marked by losing her mother at 16 and her father shortly after, leaving the family homeless. She describes building a high-profile career and persona that disconnected her from her true self, until reading Eckhart Tolle sparked a spiritual reckoning. Much of the conversation centers on her concept of the 'kindness economy' - reorienting business around people and planet, not just profit - and a shared belief that human connection, community and the office matter more than relentless productivity. They also explore intuition, meditation, sexuality and labels, the pressures of social media and consumerism, and why true joy comes from simple moments rather than excitement.
The guest's own work
Rebuild: How to Thrive in the New Kindness Economy
Mary Portas
“which is based on her new book rebuild how to thrive in the new kindness economy”— Steven Bartlett
Work Like a Woman
Mary Portas
“I remember when I wrote work like a woman I was like looking at this and thinking who who created the code who wrote this”— guest
Also referenced (named, not recommended)
A New Earth
Eckhart Tolle
“I picked up eckhart tolle's new earth and I just took it and as I left he went that's the right one”— guest
The Top Five Regrets of the Dying
Bronnie Ware
“she interviewed people on their death bed and asked them one question which was what's your biggest regret as they were dying”— Steven Bartlett
The Death and Life of Great American Cities
Jane Jacobs
“jane jacobs who wrote the death of the american city back in the 60s well before I talked about this”— guest
Start With Why
Simon Sinek
“we know that simon sinek wrote the great books on you know why rather than just it's looking at what your business is here for”— guest
Big reveals from this episode
- Portas's mother died suddenly of encephalitis when Mary was 16, and Mary took on the role of managing the home.
- Her father remarried within a year, died of a heart attack nine months later, and left the family home to his new wife, leaving the children homeless.
- At 48, despite being in the public eye and making more money than ever, Portas found herself crying almost every day from exhaustion.
- A spa visit and picking up Eckhart Tolle's 'A New Earth' began her journey of reconnecting with her true self.
- Portas has been married to a man and to a woman, and is now with a woman, rejecting fixed sexuality labels.
- Her mission shifted to the 'kindness economy' after her baby son was born the same week her elder son left for university.
- She spent three years single after splitting from her wife Melanie, calling it one of the toughest periods of her life, and is now quietly in a new relationship.
Worth remembering
- Her Irish parents - a Protestant father and Catholic mother from Belfast - chose Watford over Dagenham when they moved to England.
- Her mother died in July 1977, the same period Elvis Presley died, and Mary was confused everyone was grieving Elvis instead.
- In the pandemic her agency lost a single client worth roughly 1.5 million pounds almost overnight as high-street clients cancelled.
- She cites Jane Jacobs' idea that trivial street interactions form 'a web of security' that makes us human.
- Portas champions a 'kindness economy' defined as 'doing what's humanely right' - not taking the piss.
- She admits that as Harvey Nichols creative director she sold consumer desire built on 'I'm not good enough'.
- She believes the power of the feminine has been suppressed over millennia and is the energy needed for the next era.
- Her meditation practice is short - about 10 minutes each morning - and she laughs at intrusive thoughts rather than fighting them.
- She urges millennials and Gen Z to organise and pressure leaders to reopen offices and protect community.