Mia Khalifa (Sarah Joe): Former adult film performer turned business owner and social media personality with over 50 million followers, now building a jewelry brand and TikTok comedy following.
What this episode covers
Mia Khalifa, who goes by Sarah, tells Steven Bartlett how childhood colorism in Lebanon and bullying as a Middle Eastern kid in post-9/11 Washington DC fueled lifelong low self-esteem and people-pleasing. She describes an abusive relationship that began at 16 and an eloped marriage at 18 that pushed her toward the adult film industry, where she went from obscurity to number one in weeks before quitting after only a few months. She details the peak of her anxiety and depression in 2019-2020 when the porn company publicly attacked her over an 'in perpetuity' contract she signed as a teenager. Therapy, medication, a supportive community, and a move to Austin became her path out. Today she describes herself as unapologetic and cautious, launching a jewelry brand called Shaitan and growing a TikTok community of mostly women.
The guest's own work
The Diary of a CEO: The 33 Laws for Business, Marketing and Life
Steven Bartlett
“that book called The Diary of a CEO the 33 laws for business marketing and life is now available for pre-order”— Steven Bartlett
Also referenced (named, not recommended)
Propranolol
“I was on Lexapro I was on Propranolol I was on beta blockers everything for anxiety depression”— guest
Ramy
“it was the year I had that little cameo in that incredible show Rami um that was that was really that was a huge moment for me”— guest
That's So Raven
“it's this show with Raven Simone on the Disney Channel when we when we were growing up and she has these Visions she's a psychic”— guest
Unapologetic
Rihanna
“she has a whole album called Unapologetic and that that is what I base my my personality off of”— guest
Big reveals from this episode
- Her abusive relationship began at 16 with a man about ten years older, which she now recognizes as grooming.
- She was talked into eloping to Las Vegas just four days after her 18th birthday.
- Her husband at the time was in the Army, not the porn industry, but encouraged her into adult entertainment.
- She was only in the adult film industry for a couple of months yet went from obscurity to number one.
- Her anxiety peaked in 2019-2020 when the porn company publicly re-released corrupted old footage to retaliate.
- She signed multi-page contracts at 18 containing the words 'in perpetuity,' meaning lifelong control over her name and image.
- The company still owns a website with her name and is being sued over MLB-style trading cards of its actresses.
- She legally identifies as Sarah Joe; 'Khalifa' is also her dog's name.
Worth remembering
- She experienced colorism in Lebanon, being the darkest in her family before facing extreme bullying in America.
- She once weighed about 60 pounds more and lost it through unhealthy habits when young.
- She has been in therapy since 2016 and cycles through therapists to gain new perspectives.
- She moved from Miami to Austin within a month after a Twitter friend mentioned needing a roommate.
- After leaving the industry she worked as a paralegal at an insurance defense firm representing Geico.
- In 2019-2020 she had two therapy sessions a week, a psychiatrist, and was on Lexapro and Propranolol.
- Her biggest current anxiety is AI and deepfakes, which revive the feeling of being violated with no control.
- Her happiness formula is roughly 70 percent alone time, 20 percent energizing people, 10 percent following instinct.
- She bases her unapologetic personality on Rihanna's album 'Unapologetic.'